Reflecting Forward: Looking Backwards to Go into the Future

When we take the time to reflect and celebrate, we now position ourselves for the next phase of the journey. It’s what national championship coach, Nik Sabin, calls the 24 hour rule - his players have 24 hours to reflect back and bask in the glory of a win or the agony of defeat. After 24 hours the team has become focused on the next goal at hand trying to get another victory.

So here are a couple of tips on reflecting forward:

1. Get into the right state and environment

To be effective with self-reflection it is good to get into a suitable mental state and environment. First it is helpful to have all of our attention at the process, so don’t be distracted by maybe having the TV turned on, etc. It is best if you don’t have anything else on your mind. You don’t want to get interrupted either.

2. Ask the right questions

I usually start by asking myself the question that is on my mind, the question that expresses an inner conflict. It is something that has a continuing influence on me, where I am not satisfied with and want to change.

By asking a good question you give your brain something to work on. It will try to find a good explanation to it, starting the process of self-reflection. So it is crucial to ask the right question here, the one that expresses your topic. Good questions are always the ones that bring your topic to the point by asking “How can I …”. Usually questions starting with “Why …” are not very effective. By asking “why” questions, you will get answers why it is that way. But you want to improve here, that’s why a “how” question is more solution-oriented and therefore usually much more empowering.

12 QUESTIONS FOR THE YEAR PAST AND THE YEAR AHEAD

The Year Past:   

 1) What went well? Identify the goals you accomplished or advanced towards; and note anything else that went well and is worth highlighting.

 2) In what ways did you grow and evolve in the ‘evolution of you’?  How were you tested or challenged and how did you grow as a result? What new skills, knowledge, ideas and insights (life, work, other) have made you better or different from the beginning of the year?  

 3) What were your favorite moments of 2012? Savoring positive experiences has been proven to be a success strategy for building optimism, resilience and mojo – all essential ingredients to personal and professional wellbeing!
 

4) What do you need to clean-out or let go of right now from the year past to be ready to start fresh in 2013? Consider both your physical space (your office, your home) as well as your emotional and mental mindsets.

5) What and who are you most grateful for right now? Consider the people in your life; the circumstances; the gifts; make this a juicy list!

6) If there was a theme for 2012 for you personally, what would it be? i.e. “This was the year of ____.”

The Year Ahead:   

7) What are your goals for 2013? Consider professional goals as well as personal goals. Consider small, medium and BHAG goals (big hair audacious goals).

8) What of your strengths and assets will you deliberately use more of in the year ahead to realize your goals? Consider your personal strengths but also your assets such as your network, knowledge, experience and more. Make a plan.

9) In what ways will you take care of your personal wellbeing to maintain or boost your “Mojo” – resilience, energy, inspiration and sense of wellbeing? Take time to reflect on your physical wellbeing as well as your mental and emotional wellbeing. If you were at your peak – what would that look like? What needs to happen to bridge the gap from where you are today to where you want to be? Make a plan.

10) In what ways will you take care of your professional wellbeing to boost or maintain your work-life aspirations and career mojo?  What new skills will you acquire or deepen? How will you foster/grow your network? What new challenges will you take on? And what support might you call on to help you achieve your professional goals?

11) In what ways will you contribute something to the ‘greater good’ of _____ (choose a community or communities of choice)?

12) If the year ahead is to have a personal theme for you, what would that be? i.e. “This will be the year of ____” 

I want to close this post by a quote from Johann Wolfgang von Goethe who said: “Never by reflection, but only by doing is self-knowledge possible to one.” While this first seems like a contradiction to the process of self-reflection, it is not. The reason to do self-reflection is to be more effective in the doing.

As you strive for a better year next year- remember: believe and succeed or doubt and do without!

Be sure to tune in next year as we will be engaged in other creative opportunities to inspire and empower others - you don’t want to miss it!

Until next time, BE INSPIRED!

Dr. Inspiration

Starting Your Engine to Reach Your Goals and Dreams

Goal setting is the fuel that flames your onward progress.  It enables you to achieve your dreams and achieve your resolutions.  Don't let your goals and resolutions fall by the wayside. Chances are that to accomplish your dreams and live a life you love, those goals and resolutions are crucial.  Goal setting and goal achievement are easier if you follow these 12 steps for effective and successful goal setting and resolution accomplishment.

1. Having a positive attitude about the future. A general sense of optimism about the future helps to believe you will achieve your goals.

2.  Formulate affirmative, long-term objectives.  “To stroke motivation and ambition, focus…on the road ahead.”

3.  Don’t set goals and objectives that conflict with each other or your world view.  The more congruent your goals and objectives are, the more likely you are to achieve them.

4.  Make specific goals on a monthly plan. If a delay arises one day, your plan is still intact.

5.  Focus on just one large goal at a time.  

6.  Precommit to success and don’t give yourself alternatives.  Speak into existence before it manifests itself.

7.  Use David Allen’s Getting Things Done system.  

8.  Work on your goal every day.  The daily habit of working towards a goal produces dependable, positive, long-term results.

9.  Set your goals publicly.  If other people know about it, it’s harder to dismiss.

10.  Help others.  

11.  Monitor your actions daily.  Keep track of your progress using a smartphone app, write a sentence or two in your journal, or update your progress on Twitter.  Be sure to review your entries so you can see how well you have progressed toward your goal.

12.  Give yourself relevant rewards for achieved milestones.  Set up milestones throughout the process and award yourself when you meet these milestones.

Goal setting is the foundation for personal and business success.  I am not someone who achieves every goal he sets; I struggle and procrastinate too.  But I have improved over the past few months.  I have realized that just thinking about a goal doesn't help you achieve it.  If you utilize the tips above, you will be on your way to both successfully setting goals and achieving them.

Until next time, BE INSPIRED!

Dr. Inspiration

Influence: Should We Lead by Focusing on the Head or the Heart?

What is influence, anyway?

The dictionary defines influence as the capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone or something, or the effect itself. We all use influence with our kids, spouses/significant others, students, colleagues, employees, or customers. The question is when utilizing influence should we focus on the head or the heart of those we are trying to influence?

Both the head and the heart approach are both important; however to be most effective start by influencing the heart.  How can you do that?  Below are five strategies in using a heart approach:

1.  Validate feelings.  Before people decide what they think of your message, they decide what to think of you.  If you want those people above (customers, colleagues, etc) to listen and agree with you, you must first agree with them.  People will respect you for emphasizing with them which in turn will cause them to be more open to hearing what you have to say.

2.  Smile....and mean it!  Who would have thought something so simple would be something so powerful?   Feeling happy makes us smile, and smiling makes us happy.    It's also contagious.  Think about it...when you see someone smile, what happens?  You also smile! When we smile sincerely, that warmth is projected to others and projects back onto us. To project warmth however, you have to genuinely feel it.  

3.  Feel in command.  Warmth may be harder to fake, but confidence is harder to talk yourself into.  Feeling into command and confident is about connecting with yourself.

4.  Stand up straight.  It is hard to overstate the importance of good posture in projecting authority and an intention to be taken seriously.  It sounds trivial, but maximizing the physical space your body takes up makes a substantial difference in how your audience reacts to you, regardless of your height.

5.  Get ahold of yourself.  When you move, move deliberately and precisely to a specific spot.  Standing tall is an especially good way to project strength because it doesn't interfere with warmth in the way that other signals of strength do. 

These strategies may seem awkward but they will create a positive feedback with those you influence.  Once you establish warmth, your strength is received as a welcome reassurance.  Your ability to influence will then become a gift that not many possess.

Until next time, BE INSPIRED!

Dr. Inspiration